Maria's Random Rants

The other day we were at Target and as I put some underwear on the rolling counter my husband made a snarky comment. “Do you have to buy your granny panties from Target?” All I’m thinking is, “Excuse me???” First of all, these are not granny panties, they’re boy shorts and FYI they’re very comfortable. Second, it’s not like we’re at the $1 store.

He wasn’t convinced and still seemed pretty irate with me. This coming from the guy who likes to wear his shades at night. I mean seriously, don’t make me go there. Besides, we’re so past that point in our relationship where he even saw me in my undergarments anymore. The only time he was gonna’ see those things would be when we did the laundry.

I remember the days it was nothing to drop a bill on buying a handful of thongs at Victoria’s Secret, but that just seems ages ago. Four kids and a mortgage to pay later, I’d rather use that $100 to pay my electric bill.

I don’t know, I guess I’m older, wiser. These days my notion of sexy comes from a higher place than wearing a piece of cloth riding up my butt. Ladies, that’s actually code for “in the last few years my ass has grown to out of control proportions and I refuse to ask some cute little sales woman half my size to help me find a size XL thong”.

Epilogue…

I just received a comment from a wise friend who opposed my initial view and fear of the intimidating tiny thong. She pointed out that thongs served as a reminder to our husbands of how lucky they are to have us; hence, “every now and then the thongs need to be on display!” She also noted that “the marriage bed is holy and undefiled”. (Look that up, I had to. It’s actually pretty good.)

I believe I’ve just been schooled.  Apparently, if I want to remind my husband, and myself, of the inner and outer sexiness I possess I’m going to have to bite the bullet and pull out the thongs, or as she referred to them, “the sexies”. *Sigh*

OK, I can dig that. After all, my man did buy me that gorgeous Burberry purse last month and I have yet to show him the full measure of my gratitude.

Ladies and gents, wish me and my derriere luck, I’m gonna’ need it.

Rolling credits for the night.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=18TLHhhHZCA